Again I've proven myself I'm a complete failure!
I drawned myself in this selfpitty.. and walked my walk of shame..
If that wasn't bad enough I did the things that make me feel worse..
and above that I saw you today!
Perfect-, skinny-, young-, snobish- you.
Everything I'm not and more..
It was clear that you didn't knew who I was and that you weren't very friendly..
Or you're a good pretender..
Anyway, after seeing you my selfpitty has grown..
I'm so angry at myself right now!
Why do you have the power to make me feel like this?
I don't even know you at all. And it's shallow of me to say this but I'm never gonna like you. You will always be the one I envy.
You've got what I want but not what I need..
After all this time everything still hurts. How could I be so foolish.
What have I become? I'm apathic most of the time, scared, alone, not able to trust anything or anyone.. and above that.. I'm only interesting when having a few drinks.
Conclusion? I don't know.. just need to be fixed.
One advise to you: supersize the deal baby!
